


hopeless fountain kingdom

by squishyprince



Category: Carmilla (Web Series), Carmilla - All Media Types
Genre: But there will also be fluff, F/F, and SMUT, pretty angsty, tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-03
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-18 13:36:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11291751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squishyprince/pseuds/squishyprince
Summary: A hollstein one shot inspired by the song Hopeless off of Halsey's new album.





	hopeless fountain kingdom

_ Boy, you make it look so easy _

 

Laura Hollis is a wave. No, she’s a tsunami. No, she’s an ocean full of tsunamis and waves so rough and brash they would make Poseidon blush. And you? Well, you’re just a girl in a dinky lifeboat, patched up with duct tape and corks in the holes; absolutely and in no way equipped to handle the storm that was coming towards you. You can sense her presence from miles away; feeling the wind pick-up and rain drops prickling your skin as they fall from newly formed storm clouds. Her close proximity invites the waves higher, and you reach your hand out to touch them because if you’re going to drown, you want to remember the way the water felt against your skin. If Laura Hollis is a hurricane, she made you realize just how much you love the rain.

 

Except, she isn’t. She’s just a girl that whirls in like a tornado, leaving a path of destruction in her wake. You expect the mess now; you’ve learned how to pick up the pieces of your heart and cover the marks of possession from a girl who doesn’t want to own you. You know that come Monday morning, she’ll go back to pretending you don’t exist. Laura Hollis has better people to spend her time with, more important friends to talk to. But that doesn’t mean she won’t invite you over Monday night and ask you to tell her about your day with your head between her legs.

 

You know you shouldn’t watch others fawn over her, and you know you shouldn’t be one of those who are in the first place. But you can’t deny yourself the pleasure of looking at something so beautiful it hurts. She’s like looking at the sun and you are so far beyond blind that you just don’t stop looking. A heart is just an organ that pumps blood till someone makes it feel like a bolt of lightning and a stone all at once. 

 

_ Cause you know the truth hurts, but secrets kill _

 

“Carmilla, I heard that Lawrence was talking shit about you,” Lafontaine bothers you at lunch, their legs halfway into the cafeteria table before their mouth is open. The anger inside them has made their cheeks turn the color of their hair, and Perry just silently sits down beside them.

 

“So? That’s nothing from the usual with Xena,” you remark, unphased by Laf’s declaration. It wasn’t a normal day if someone wasn’t bad mouthing you; you had never done anything wrong, but when the popular kids don’t like you, no one does.

 

“But it’s different this time. They were mocking you and calling you a vampire whore and it was Laura who started it all.” Her name hits you like a kick to the ribs and makes you wish you had taken those self defense classes as a child. But what good is protecting your body when the wounds aren’t physical. You can see the worry bubbling up inside of Perry as Lafontaine’s anger mounted.

 

“She hates me, they all do,” you spit out, the bitterness lingers on your tongue making your face twist in disgust. The only problem is, you know that it’s true; they do hate you, and no amount of Laura screaming your name is going to convince them otherwise if it’s only heard in private. You watch as Perry gives a worried look to you and then to Lafontaine, and you simply drop your eyes back down towards a half eaten lunch.

 

“I don’t understand how you can be so, so blazé about all of this! They spread rumors about you fucking teachers for good grades or spiking the drinks at school dances. Whatever good deed you do they counter it with thousands of bad things that you’ve never done!” Lafontaine shouts back and you feel as each word knocks into you with increasing force. “Don’t you care about yourself at all?”

 

Your sandwich has never become more intriguing to look at, and you don’t need to look up to know they have stormed off; a forgotten lunch and a wince on Perry’s face is left in their wake. You don’t blame them for being angry with you; they want you to care about you as much as they do, and they don’t know why you never stand up for yourself. Perry’s face softens as she looks at you, because she knows that Laura’s number is saved under a different name in your phone. She knows that you’d never tell Lafontaine because they wouldn’t understand, and would be far more betrayed than supportive. You’re far too fragile to even think of losing another friend when making more isn’t an option. Hollis has already taken that privilege away from you.

 

_ Cause you know the good die young, but so did this and so it must be better than I think it is _

 

You remember the first time she asked you to come over: she called you, her voice whispered a demand for your presence that was too forceful to give you any time to wonder how she even got your number. You didn’t find the time to care either, instead grabbing your leather jacket and car keys before speeding off to the address she had texted you.

 

When she opened the door you wanted to drop to your knees and worship the girl standing in front of you; that sinfully toned body clad in a blood red silk robe. She looked like a goddess and a mistress all at once. You wanted to open your mouth and question, but the way she looked at you only left you stunned; under her gaze you became a cool drink of water on a hot summer day. Your mind demanded an explanation but your heart was beating too fast to ignore it. You had been expecting something like this, but expectations and reality rarely are so closely related. She was tugging you through the threshold by a fistful of your shirt before you could think any longer. She let go of you as forcefully as she grabbed you, leaving your head spinning as you watched her close the front door.

 

“My dad isn’t home.” Laura spoke as she turned back around to face you. Those few words in a hushed tone sent shivers down your back; this was better than expectations, better than it had been in your imagination. You licked your lips as she strode closer to you, wanting to telegraph just how hungry you were. You wanted to touch every part of her, inhale every scent her body had to offer, find out what your name tasted like in her mouth, “So I was thinking we take this upstairs.”

 

It wasn’t a question, yet not a demand either; the statement weighed heavily on what little space lied between your bodies. She was giving you a way out, but it’s impossible to resist Laura Hollis, especially when you want her. You were convinced that if you spoke, the spell would be broken; the dream would end and you’d wake up panting in your bed with the sheets in knots. The response you gave was a simple nod, but it was all Laura needed to pick up the reigns. 

 

You followed her up the stairs, silently memorizing the walls and pathway to her room, wondering if this would be the only time you’d ever see them or would have to start planning escape routes. Once you were inside her room you heard the door shut and suddenly her body was cemented to yours. A firm kiss to your lips clicked your thoughts off as your hands switched to autopilot, running down the smooth silk covering the muscles in Laura’s back.

 

Time was no longer a concept your mind could perceive as you felt her hands on you, roaming over your body like you were a forest she was determined to get lost in. Reason went to the wayside when you heard the breathy moans that slipped from her lips when yours connected with her neck. Second guessing disappeared as quickly as it had arrived when Laura bit your lip and only tugged on it harder after hearing you whine. Nothing about this was gentle or caring; this was a need from the deepest parts of your core begging to be fulfilled. This was a craving that needed to be satisfied, and the most addicting part was that she was just as desperate for you. She wanted you; a feeling that could make someone's head and heart inflate so quickly, they would surely pop. You could feel yourself slipping into the luxuries of the moment, and the sound of Laura chanting your name as you left your mark on her skin made you feel drunk.

 

You could feel her desperation as she tugged off your jacket, your shirt quickly following suit and ending up somewhere on the floor. As she struggled with the button on your jeans you took a leap of faith and reached out to place a hand on the tie of her robe. The fumbling hands on your hips stilled as you slowly released the tension in the knot till the fabric fell open. Your mouth went dry as you ran your fingertips up the front of her abdomen, slipping them under the top of the silk to let the robe slip off and fall to the floor.

 

_ I hope, hopeless, changes over time _

 

You remember the way it felt for her finger to touch you, her breath to ghost over your skin. The way you can make her mouth to chant your name like you are a prayer and she is trying to save herself from eternal damnation. You can make her come undone with your words and leave her a whimpering mess with your hands and mouth. But you can’t make her love you, because you wake up alone, or you’ve already let yourself out. You are wanted.

 

But only sometimes.


End file.
